huck blog

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everything changes

March 28, 2009, 9:47 am

Troy and I got U2 concert tickets for September 24th this week and I caught myself picturing my life on that day exactly how it is today. It’s a Thursday this year and that means I’ll be at FACPAC in the morning excitedly talking with my friends about our big plans for the evening. Except that I won’t be at FACPAC because Huck won’t be at FACPAC. Huck will be in pre-school while I’m at home “getting things done.” It was a strange moment for me, realizing that in such a short time our lives are going to be very different. It’s not a bad thing, change. It’s just hard at first.

Our neighbors and old friends Tiffany, Brian and Kadin are moving soon, and I finally broke the news to Huck a few days ago. He became quiet and his breathing got a little quicker as I explained that they’ll still be in New York and we’ll still see them a lot and even have slumber parties, but I know what he was thinking. It won’t be the same.

Troy’s dad just survived brain surgery and a long stint in the hospital and my dad is in the middle of radiation for prostate cancer. Both dads are doing well, but it’s got me thinking and looking at old pictures in my hundreds of albums. I got that strange feeling again when I relived a particularly fun Thanksgiving back in 2005 when the Tacketts visited. There was little Huck scooching around in his diapers, little Lily waddling around in hers and big gigantic old Noah leading the pack. After doing a little math I realized that he was only four. You know, Huck’s age now.

During the conversation about our neighbors’ move we somehow got on the subject of Huck going off to college someday. He said he may go to a college in the state next to Illinois so he could see Aunt Jeni for dinner sometimes. We looked around his room and I asked him if there was anything in there he would take to college with him, pointing out his toy box which was mine as a child and which I did take with me to college and every home since. He very clearly said, "Everything. I will take everything with me to college.”

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last dance

March 24, 2009, 6:41 pm

Today was Huck's last dance class until his recital next Tuesday afternoon. Afterwards he could not contain his relieved smile when I told him he was all done with class. "Do you want to take ballet again?" I asked. "No!" he cheerfully replied.

Got it.

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this boy really likes to ride his bike

March 21, 2009, 7:29 pm

Our friend Reverend Parrish told Huck he was "fierce" on his bike, and because he loves her and because of the way she said it, this is his new identity. He is a Fierce bike rider. He wants to ride his bike all the time. "It's a Hotrock!" he tells passers-by, as if that's a word he's known all his life. Sometimes Troy and Huck go bike riding together and apparently Huck passes him with confidence. Why? Because he's Fierce.

Just wait till the training wheels come off.

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you really can't teach an old dog anything

March 16, 2009, 3:09 pm

Max turned 15 yesterday! Who knows how much longer our old dog will be around, and I sometimes wonder if Huck will really remember him. I'm sure he'll talk about him for years to come as he does about Molly, and he never even met her.

Max has become inconsistently incontinent in his old age and I don't always handle his messy accidents very gracefully. Recently I was very upset and yelled, "Bad Dog! Bad Dog! Bad Dog! Bad Dog!" more times than necessary. Later I apologized to Max for yelling at him and told Huck I shouldn't have called him Bad. A few days later I was back in the throes of heated frustration and again called Max a Bad Dog. Immediately Huck scolded me and said, "He is NOT bad." A few days ago Huck made a mess at the dinner table and I said, "Huck, no! That was a Bad Decision! Bad Decision!" And then for some reason I added another "Bad Decision!" Huck said, "That's what you should say to Max the next time he pees on the rug."

At least once a day Huck will declare that "something smells yuck" and then will figure out the source and say, "Oh, it's Max's breath." At other times I'll ask who's smelling up the joint with all the tooting and Huck will point to Max, later confessing with a smile, "It was really me."

Aunt Jeni has known Max for a long time and noticed a big change in him during her recent visit. She reminded me how much he used to bark (he doesn't do that anymore since he can't hear much) and how aggressive he could be (if he gets too aggressive nowadays his teeth fall out). She said, "He's actually a great dog now!"

Who could use a pair of diapers.

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big birthday boy

March 9, 2009, 8:11 pm

Over the weekend while you were changing your clocks Huck turned four! And as always Aunt Jeni came and made the weekend extra special for all of us. Huck became attached to Jeni from the moment she stepped out of her taxi cab and onto our sidewalk. I was basically on vacation all weekend because no one compared to Aunt Jeni. Troy had an ongoing comedy routine about being a distant third in his own home with his own son. And I mean really, really distant.

Huck and Jeni enjoyed spraying illegal amounts of cheese onto crackers (and then taking turns chopping each other’s fingers off as punishment), playing on the Webkinz website (for now Huck is the proud owner of a Webkinz Frog named Spot and I fear our lives may never be the same), playing with all sorts of colorful dyes and messy soap putties in the bathtub, and cuddling passionately with each other. We all agreed it's a good thing that four-and-a-half year old cousin Lily Starr was not here to witness any of this affection. (As well as Uncle Nathan, for that matter.)

The day before Huck’s birthday we enjoyed the Bronx Zoo where there was a hint of spring in the air. It was here that Huck realized his Aunt Jeni would almost never say no to carrying him around, something his parents almost never say yes to anymore. She should probably see the chiropractor soon.

By the time we woke up on Huck's birthday we'd already had much to eat and drink, including refrigerated Rolos, Shirley Temples, ice cream cones and cookies. While making cupcakes that morning Huck said, "Just looking at them makes me want to barf." I need to make a mental note for next year: don’t feed the child (and everyone else) so much wonderful junk food during birthday weekend.

Huck's birthday was beautiful and spring-like for the first time since 2005, and this meant showing Aunt Jeni his new bike. Moments after this picture was taken Huck complained of being hot and ripped off most of his clothing.

And then it was off to Huck’s Superhero party! He invited four little friends to join him in the church gym as a superhero of their creation. Troy gathered a bunch of big boxes and made them into a superhero city for the children to play in and eventually destroy. Is there anything more fun to a four year old than a cardbox box? You can imagine the thrill of 50 of them. Daddy moved up to #1.

Here are the heroes enjoying some snacks: Iron Boy Valentino, Car Man Kadin, Super Mover Jacob, Hawk Eye Huck and Super Sparkle Olive. (Special thanks to Tia Rosie for making unbelievably delicious chocolate Spider-Man lollipops for the party!)

And here we are back at home pretending like we’re going to have a piece of cake. Instead this cake got taken to church the next morning where I made people eat it. And there Huck got to celebrate some more with his Betty and Jeimy.

On Sunday evening we went to our favorite Indian restaurant on the lower east side and joined our Brooklyn friends Shannon, John, Shana, Russell and Michael for more celebration. Huck wowed everyone with his two new magic tricks: the old cut-off-your-finger number, followed by the break-a-pencil-into-three- pieces-and-then-magically-put-the-pencil-back-together. (Thanks for the cool tricks, Lily!) I brought a few humble leftover cupcakes and our aggressive waiter took them from me, insisting he would do something exciting. Moments later the cupcakes reappeared with a shiny sparkler coming out of one, some more waiters clapping and singing, the loudest Indian birthday music ever, and a police siren set up on a nearby table. I don't think I've ever seen Aunt Jeni laugh so hard and I'll tell you this much: they really jazzed up my cupcakes.

Thanks to all you family and friends who love Huck all year round! And thanks to those of you who made his birthday weekend so much fun. I'm left with that empty feeling in the pit of my heart sensation I get every time Jeni packs up and leaves us and am already counting down the days till next March.

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happy birthday, huck!

March 7, 2009, 8:00 am

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almost four

March 4, 2009, 7:15 pm

Three more days till Huck turns four, and that means we're excitedly getting ready to welcome Aunt Jeni tomorrow for her annual March visit! Huck thinks that when we wake up we’ll find her sitting on our couch waiting for us. He also requested that he be bald for her visit, and while he did go to the barber this afternoon I promise you he still has hair.

Here's a snippet of Huck's life in his last days of threedom: When we get home from somewhere he immediately strips down to his boxer briefs and tank top, clearly having learned from his mother (and Michael) the benefits of always wearing pajamas while home. Lately he's been making up stuff he's learned online, as if he spends his day sitting here researching somewhat useless (and occasionally shocking) information. When he pretends to be a doctor or dentist he casually hums during the routine check-up, always putting his patient at ease (and almost to sleep). His favorite girl by far is Olive and one might say they were in love in a kind of temper tantrum-y way. Sometimes Huck says “Oh my gosh!” and “Lord have mercy!” and “Thank God!” in a way that makes him sound a couple dozen years older than he really is.

In dance class Huck always wears tank tops and sweat pants and looks like a short Stanley Kowalski next to a bunch of delicate Blanches. Recently Huck told me that he does not like dance class but will continue to go until it's over. When I told him that he looks like he's having fun, he reminded me of the discouraged expression he gave me through the door window the other week. "I was trying to show you that I wasn't having fun," he explained. No matter, he continues to be cheerful and cooperative when he's in the class and we're all excited for his dance recital coming up at the end of the month. Yesterday he did get a little talking-to by Miss Katie for kissing Kadin on the lips during class. Huck is very physically affectionate (to put it lightly) and this wasn't the first time we had to have the maybe-you-should-stop-kissing-your-friends-on-the-lips-all-the-time conversation. I told him to save it for Aunt Jeni.

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snow day

March 2, 2009, 3:13 pm

We woke up this morning to a whole lot of snow, and after our Monday play school group Troy met Shamie, Jacob, Huck and me at Fort Tryon Park for a lunch break sledding adventure, thanks to a borrowed sled and a couple of silver trays Troy brought from the church. We didn't stay for very long due to the unbelievably cold temperatures but it was awfully fun while it lasted. And now we're enjoying one of the best parts of winter: being warm and cozy together inside.

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